


Life's so Reckless, Tragedy Endless

by Verycoolkraut



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: 1910s, Alcohol, Alternate Universe - 1910s, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - World War I, Anxiety, Assassination, Bad Cooking, Bars and Pubs, Books, College, Drinking, Gen, Hate Crimes, Murder, New York, Racial Tension, Racism, Swearing, Tension, Veth is not an great cook, War time, Why does life suck for Bren, World War I
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-06
Updated: 2020-03-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:41:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22591177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Verycoolkraut/pseuds/Verycoolkraut
Summary: Bren never thought he would leave home, leave his family, but here he was, watching his parents wave goodbye to him as his ship leaves the Port of Hamburg. It's a little surreal, traveling to America used to be an unrealistic hope that he had when he was younger, and suddenly it was really happening, he is traveling to America for a better life, better schooling, just, better.
Relationships: Beauregard Lionett & Caleb Widogast, Beauregard Lionett & Nott, Beauregard Lionett & Yasha, Jester Lavorre/Caleb Widogast, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Veth Brenatto & Beauregard Lionett, Veth Brenatto & Caleb Widogast, Veth Brenatto & Yeza Brenatto
Comments: 8
Kudos: 23





	1. Chapter 1

_1910 ___

__Bren never thought he would leave home, leave his family, but here he was, watching his parents wave goodbye to him as his ship leaves the Port of Hamburg. It's a little surreal, traveling to America used to be an unrealistic hope that he had when he was younger, and suddenly it was really happening, he is traveling to America for a better life, better schooling, just, better._ _

__The only real reason Bren was traveling to America was for school, though. Germany lacked what he desired in terms of colleges that offered his literature major and also lacked in what he thought himself to be capable of. What Germany did not have in the sense of schools, America did, and that’s what he was looking for._ _

__Bren is a patient man, but the anticipation was seriously killing him, and could anyone really blame him? He was on a boat headed towards America, _the land of opportunity, _to go to school, a very good one at that. Every time he thought about it he couldn't stop the little cry of excitement his body let out, his life had never been so on track before and now it seems like all of his jumbled puzzle pieces are finally fitting together.___ _

____Although he saw his life approaching its highest peak, he couldn't say the same for his current situation. He found himself regurgitating his meals over the side of the boat more often than he'd like to, the constant rocking of the boat not being a pleasant environment for Bren. He's heard that the ship should take three weeks, _three weeks _to get to America, it was almost enough for him to regret going. Almost.___ _ _ _

______He spent the majority of his time on the ship reflecting on what’s in store for him. He was already accepted into the school he wanted, New York University, with a huge scholarship that will help him immensely in paying off his education. He still finds it a little shocking that his parents were capable of amassing the amount of money needed to get a ticket for the boat ride, changing his what was a pipe dream into a reality that he will never be thankful enough for. He doesn’t need to worry about residence, the college thankfully provides it, but he is going to need to think about getting some sort of side job if he wants to eat, he only came with his most important things and a handful of marks._ _ _ _ _ _

______When he didn’t have his face crammed into one of his books that he certainly has read at least 10 times by now, he accidentally found himself becoming the friend of another man on board. At first encounter, Bren was a little concerned that he was about to get beat up judging by the mans impressive stature and somewhat menacing scars tracing along the mans face. It didn't take very long, however, for this fear to subside. The man was from Britain, headed to America for education like he was, and introduced himself as, “Fjord, just Fjord”. Although Bren did not find himself talking to Fjord very often, it was sometimes reassuring to know that he wasn't a total lost cause when it came to talking to new people, and it served as good practice of the language he would be mostly speaking.  
It was a little over three weeks and lots of hurling meals overboard before he caught the first sight of what he was looking for. The statue was gargantuan, even from a distance he could make out many of the features of the lady that he'd heard so much about and dreamed of seeing in person so many times. The Lady of the Harbor, Mother of Freedom, _the Statue of Liberty. _Seeing her in person was true confirmation that his pipe dream when he was younger is no longer just a pipe dream, he is here, he’s made it. He thinks of a poem that he was especially fond of as a child,___ _ _ _ _ _

________Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,  
With conquering limbs astride from land to land,  
Here at our sea-washed, sunset- gates shall stand  
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame  
Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name  
Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand  
Glows world-wide welcome, her mild eyes command  
The air-bridged harbor that twin-cities frame._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!” cries she,_  
With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor,  
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,  
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore;  
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,  
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”_ _ _

________It isn't long before he is passing by the statue, and _gottverdammt, she is massive, _the books and stories he's read really weren't lying. The statue was close to if not 100 meters tall from the look of it. He must have zoned out thinking about the statue because suddenly the boat had docked in New York Harbor and he could see the swarms of people rushing to get off of the boat as the bridge is lowered. _Heh, good to see I wasn't the only one eager to get off this boat, _he thinks to himself as he sees a familiar friendly face approaching him, Fjord._____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“So, I guess this is goodbye”, he says, rubbing the back of his neck. “It was nice meetin’ ya, where you staying? I wouldn't mind paying you a visit sometime if you’re going to be sticking around here.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Bren doesn’t think too much about the words that come out of his mouth, unfortunately. “Ah, ja, I’ll be staying at New York University, you may visit if you like.” _You dummkopf, why would you invite him? You're here to study, not to make friends.__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“Hmm, maybe. Well, I don't know about you but I don’t want to be caught on the return journey of this boat so I'll be going. Maybe we’ll see each other around someday.” He makes his way with his things to the bridge that is noticeably less crowded than it was when they first arrived at the port. “Good luck with school!” He calls as he makes his way down to the docks and is lost in the bustling crowd of people._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“Danke”, Bren says far too quietly if he was actually expecting Fjord to hear him and he makes his way down to where his shitty room was and gathered his belongings before making his way down the bridge like the rest of the disembarked passengers did._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________He can’t help but take a look around as soon as his feet touch dry land _in America! _He can’t wait to write to his parents and thank them for this wonderful opportunity that they've gifted him. For now, however, he needs to make his way to his college so he can prepare for his first semester, which should only be beginning in the next few months. He feels a little embarrassed by how excited he is, but he just spent 3 something weeks on a _boat _to get to his new _college _that he was so very close to at the moment! How could he not be excited? His semester is going to be great, he knows it. “Danke, Mutter und Vater”, he mutters to himself before making his way towards his new home, his new family, his new _life _._________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________\---------------------------_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________________1912_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Life for Bren has been surprisingly good. He’s heard rumors about immigrants being persecuted and discriminated against, but he hasn't experienced any sort of mistreatment from his peers or superiors. He doesn’t have many friends, but then again, he was never good at making friends, especially because he has his face crammed into some kind of book at least 12 hours a day, only setting it down during his classes and when he sleeps. So yeah, Bren doesn’t really have any friends. He doesn't have any enemies either, which to him is far more important. Well, it’s not exactly true if Bren says he has no friends, he has Veth._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________When Bren moved into his college dorm about two years ago, he was roomed with a very short girl from Galena, Illinois, who was also a college freshman that was majoring in chemistry. The only reason Bren found himself acquainted with another person is that she was about as antisocial and studious as he was. She never invited anyone over to their dorm for parties (thank God) or to hang out, and she was a quiet, respectful roommate who sometimes offered to help Bren with his studies. In short, Bren was very happy with his roommate, and he didn’t even know that she was married until she asked him if it was okay for her husband to come visit their dorm a few weeks ago._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________As much as Bren thought he would detest the visit, what could he say to her? It was her husband, she had every right to see him and he had every right to see her as well. Much to his surprise, meeting Yeza was not difficult or uncomfortable at all. He was very similar to his wife, both physically (in terms of height), mentally (in terms of them both majoring in chemistry), and socially (in terms of them both being reserved in dialogue and action). In short, Bren could safely say that Yeza became one of his friends in a short period of time even though they didn’t really do anything together._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Veth was very intent on getting Bren to be more social, and she managed to convince him to join a local German literacy organization. Although he often did not attend many activities the organization hosted that didn't include books, he was very glad that Veth pushed him to join the club. It was not only a welcoming space to read, but it was a perfect place to converse in his native tongue (He also found a very cute cat that comes to the meeting quite often and it seems to take a liking to him)._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________"The Land of Opportunity" is certainly what Bren would describe this place as, he's never felt so successful, so free in his life!_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________\---------------------_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________________________1914 ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________The following years pass just as well as the previous. College continues on well, Bren and Yeza become closer friends as Veth has him visit more often, and the German literacy organization he goes to is prospering. He’s reading in a corner of the room, the rest of the members of the organization discussing something about a charity work over the weekend that he simply cannot be bothered with, while scratching an orange bengal cat that's made itself comfortable on his lap._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________“You know, Frumpkin”, he says to the cat, “this place in incredible and I'd love to stay here all day reading with you,” he says as he dog-ears his book on the revolutionary war and closes it on his lap, “but I need to go home now, I’ll see you in a couple of days”. As he goes to stand up, the cat leaps from his lap to his shoulder and lies down across his shoulders like a scarf._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________“You want to come home with me, Frumpkin?” Bren asks the cat, fully aware that he must look some kind of crazy wearing a cat around his neck and talking to it like it can answer his questions._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________________________“Mrrroww,” _the cat purrs into his ear and he thinks that’s definitely the best answer he's going to get.__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________“Alright, alright _katze _, I'm sure they'll let me take you, you’re just a stray anyways.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Bren packs up the books he was reading into his bookbag, Frumpkin still nestled around his shoulders, and makes his way towards the exit where he can see a young boy attaching lots of flyers to several spots on the windows and walls around the organization. He makes his way outside and nearly drops his bag as he takes down one of the flyers and reads it_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________________________Archduke Franz Ferdinand Assassinated! Austria-Hungary Declares War on Serbia! ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	2. Like a Siren in my Head That Always Pledges to Repeat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bren looks down at the flyer in his hand in shock, his country is going to war against Serbia? “Schiesse”, he hisses under his breath. “Everything was going so well here”, he says to no one as he makes his way back to his dorm. Only a few minutes away from his dorm he sees a small crowd of people blocking his way holding signs, as he gets closer to them, he sees they are mostly other college students––some of which he shares classes with–– holding anti-war seminant signs and screaming it at everyone walking by.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back and I have more stuff, enjoy!

_Archduke Franz Ferdinand Assassinated! Austria-Hungary Declares War on Serbia! ___

__Bren looks down at the flyer in his hand in shock, his country is going to war against Serbia? “Schiesse”, he hisses under his breath. “Everything was going so well here”, he says to no one as he makes his way back to his dorm. Only a few minutes away from his dorm he sees a small crowd of people blocking his way holding signs, as he gets closer to them, he sees they are mostly other college students––some of which he shares classes with–– holding anti-war seminant signs and screaming it at everyone walking by._ _

___It looks like I'll be taking the long route to my dorm, _Bren thinks as he turns heel and starts walking away from the crowd of people. He doesn't step more than 3 feet away from them before the booming voice of a woman calls out from behind him. “Hey, you! Yeah, long brown coat guy!” _Fuck, she’s talking to me, _he thinks as looks down to inspect his clothing and sure enough he's wearing his brown coat that extends down to his ankles. He continues walking as if he hadn't heard her, hopefully she’ll let him be. “Alright, asshole!” He hears the same voice call from behind him as he continues to walk away from the amassing crowd of “war protestors”.____ _ _

______It takes him an extra twenty minutes to walk all the way around his school and approach from a different side, but there were no people standing outside on this side, so it was worth it. As he kicked open his door, hands occupied, he finds that his dorm is empty. Well, it isn't _empty, _it’s just lacking in the presence of his roommate. Normally this wouldn't be troubling to him, in fact he might be happy that he doesn’t have to even see another human, but after seeing the flyer–that he was currently crushing in his white-knuckle death grip–and the group of protestors outside, he was kind of hoping to be able to talk to somebody, and who better to talk to than his only friend?___ _ _ _ _ _

_________”Mrrowwww” ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Ah, yes. Bren nearly forgot about Frumpkin until he purred into his ear. “I do not have any cat food for you,” he says to the cat as he's taking it off of his shoulders, “but I can give you some of my food if you would like that.” Frumpkin purrs quietly and slinks his way to the ripped up armchair in the back of the room that Bren uses often for his reading. Bren steps into the small kitchen the dorm provides (a microwave, a single burner stove, a sink, and a couple cabinets) and is immediately caught off guard by the smell of something burning. He looks to the stove and sees a piece of bread that is currently on fire with the burner on it’s medium setting._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Shitshitshitshitshit”, Bren says as turns off the stove and bolts out of his dorm room down the hallway to where he remembers the fire towels were shown to be. He runs down one hallway, then another until he reaches one of the central points of the building. He sees a small, red commode on the far wall, and and he runs to it, pulling it open. Inside he sees a few bottles of painkillers, a first aid kit, and– _yes! _–A small red bag with a fire blanket inside. He takes the bag and starts his mad dash back to his dorm room. He heads down the hallway and is about to take a turn down the second hallway when he sees Veth and another woman walking down the opposing hallway, walking towards him.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“Hey Bren!” Veth calls as he beats her to the corner and starts running to his dorm. He doesn’t have any time to chit-chat._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________He nearly freezes up a few seconds after he turns the corner when he hears the woman's voice. “Hey, is that-, Hey! Coat man!” _fuck, _he resists groaning audibly and finishes his dash to the dorm. Thankfully, the room hasn't completely burned down when he arrives, and he throws the blanket over the stove and pan that is currently on fire. He lets out a loud sigh of relief as the sound of cracking fire dies beneath the blanket. He’s going to need to have a serious talk with Veth about her cooking.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Bren doesn’t get much time to relish in the relief before the door swings open behind him and Veth, along with the woman, enter the dorm. “Hey Bren, what had you in such a hurry to get back here? Also, I know you don't like company much but I just met this girl and-”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Bren holds a hand up to stop her storytelling which would most likely go on for an undesirable amount of time if he didn’t stop her soon. “Veth”, Bren starts, “We need to have a serious talk about your cooking.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Veth’s face freezes where she was talking and the blood drains from her face, probably realizing her error, Bren assumes. “Ohmygod!” She blurts out, “I'm so sorry! I was going to make grilled cheese but then I heard the protesters saying something about a war and I just had to find out what they were talking about so I ran outside to figure out what was up and that's where I met Beau”–Veth gestures lamely to the woman standing next to her– “and we started chatting and I told her I had a German roommate and she was like ‘oh, can I meet him?’ And I said ‘sure’, and I completely forgot I left the stove on!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Bren just stood there as the story flew out of Veth’s mouth, (it was kind of impressive that she got everything out in one breath, too) and waited for her to finish. Bren coughs awkwardly to kill the silence, “Just- just don’t do it again? Please?” Bren says, voice rising in pitch as he finishes his request. “And, um, why is she here again?” He asks, nodding towards the woman he heard Veth call Beau._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Veth jumps a little at the question, “oh, well, she seemed really interested in-”, the woman, who Bren now realizes is _fucking ripped, _cuts her off.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“She told me she had a German roommate and I wanted to talk to him, I didn't realize that German roommate would be the dick that was ignoring me earlier.” _This is a very interesting character, _Bren thought in between the fear of this horribly awkward conversation that was _definitely _going to be getting worse._____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________Veth immediately turned on Beau after her accusation. “Bren isn't a dick! She screamed, and Bren winced a little at the pitch, “He just doesn’t like talking to people very much! He’s very smart,” she finishes admirably. Although Veth was defending him, it kind of made him want to sink into his armchair and- _oh crap, _he brought Frumpkin home as well, he's going to need to talk to Veth about that too. He regrets his previous desire of talking to Veth about _anything _today._____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Beau rolls her eyes at Veth. “Yeah, whatever you say, just don’t bust my eardrums out next time you want to defend your boyfriend, alright?” She turns to Bren, who is now red-faced at her previous comment, and holds her hand out to him. “Beauregard, but call me Beau.” She says to him and he reaches his own, slightly shaking hand out to hers, accepting her handshake which nearly crushes his hand, and he needs to make an effort to not show the pain in his hand._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________“Br- Bren” He mumbles. She stays looking at him curiously, never letting go of his hand. After an inordinate amount of time for hand-shaking, Bren says awkwardly, “Um, can you- can you please let go of my hand? You're crushing it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________For some reason his own awkwardness seemed to bring out awkwardness in her as well, and she quickly let go of his hand. “Oh, uhm, right, sorry.” The two of them stand together awkwardly, not really knowing what to do when they hear a cry from the “living room” of the dorm._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________“Oh my goodness, this is adorable!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Bren and Beau turn to see Veth aggressively hugging an orange bengal cat as it tries to wiggle out of her grasp. “Oh Veth, would you mind handing him to me-” Bren says as he approaches her with his arms out. Veth reluctantly lets go of the bengal and it jumps up onto Brens shoulders. “I, well, he wanted to come home with me from the club. I didn’t think it would be much of an issue to keep him, he’s a stray anyways.” Although Bren is almost certain that Veth would love to keep the cat, he wanted to reassure her that it should be okay to keep it in the dorm. “Our dorms don't have any rules on keeping pets inside of them…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Veth’s face breaks out into a beaming smile watching the cat make itself comfortable around Bren’s neck. “Of course! Oh, I'm going to have to pick up some cat food, and maybe a bed. I could ask Yeza if-”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________She was going off again, so Caleb decided to stop her before she went on for too long. “I can deal with whatever I'll need for him, but thank you for your willingness to help,” he says with a small smile, “No need to bother Yeza over it, I can take care of it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________From across the room, Beau clears her throat awkwardly. “Should I.. go?” She asks, far less certain of herself than Bren ever thought he'd hear her. He was about to agree with her that she should leave but Veth is seeming particularly chatty today and beats him to it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________“Nonono, it’s about dinner time, you can stay if you'd like,” she makes puppy eyes at Beau, clearly hoping she’ll stay._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Beau thinks for a minute before nodding at Veth. “I mean, if it's no problem I wouldn't mind staying for a meal." She lowers herself into one of the rickety wooden chairs that sat around the tiny table._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Bren sighs, "you know, it's not very common that something Veth cooks constitutes as food." Over near the kitchen, the sound of pots and bagged food hits the countertop and Veth's head turns at his comment_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________"Hey, I heard that!"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________\--------------------------_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________"Well shit", Beau says after finishing her meal. "I don't know what the fuck you were talking about Ermandrud, but that was the best cooking I've had in a long time."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Veth beams at the compliment and turns to Bren. "See! I told you I wasn't a bad cook! You're just picky and only like stuff from Germany!"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Bren doesn't know why he would contest the girls claim, so he folds. "Ja, ja, alright. Your cooking is the best Veth," he says, rolling his eyes. Veth let's out a satisfied _hmph _and jumps down from the table and runs to the kitchen with the dishes and starts cleaning. Bren turns his attention back to the table and sees Beau staring at him inquisitively. He immediately feels anxious under the intense observation.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________Suddenly, she speaks up. "Why did you leave Germany?" She doesn't sound interrogative, just curious. _very curious. _____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________"Well, I came here to study mostly, schools in Germany with literature degrees are hard to come by, and I got accepted into a good school." His answer is completely honest so he doesn't know why he feels like he answered her incorrectly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________The two of them stare at each other in awkward silence until Veth comes back to the table, clean dishes back in their respective cabinets. "We should go out tonight!" She exclaims, breaking the awkwardness. "I haven't gotten wasted in over a week," she mumbles under her breath._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________Beau slams her hands on the table and leans forwards as Veth makes her suggestion. “Veth, I think that's the best idea you've had all day,” and she stands up from the table._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________“Er, I don’t think I will be joining you ladies, I have some reading to do,” Bren says as he lifts himself from his chair. As he turns from the two of them, he hears Veth clear her throat._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________“Bren, all you do is read. You have to go out sometime! Have some fun! Maybe meet a lady.” She adds a little eyebrow waggle to her suggestion._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________He prepares to counter her suggestion when Beau adds on. “Yeah dude, you look like someone who's in desperate need of a good time.” His face reddens a little at her comment. “C’mon Ermandrud, I’ll buy you a drink or five.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________________________Sigh ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________\------------------------_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________The bar was busier than usual, Bren predicts that it's because after hearing the news of the war starting, lots of people figured it would be a good time to get shitfaced. The three of them found themselves a table, and Veth ran off towards the bar to get some drinks. Bren looks up at Beau, who seems to be looking at a few women at other tables scattered throughout the bar._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________"So", Bren starts, "Miss Beauregard, I told you why I'm here, you tell me why you're here". She gives him a considering gaze for a moment and then turns back fully towards their table._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________"First of all, never call me that again, that was fucking weird. And I'm from Burke, small town, North of here. My parents sent me to some monastery up there, but it was fucking stupid so I ditched the place without telling my parents. They probably disowned me, but I'm going for a major in business so fuck em’.” Bren was a little taken aback at how she talked about her parents, but when he was about to ask her why her parents did what they did, he noticed her mouth was handling slightly ajar, eyes trained on someone sitting behind him. He turned around and saw a _massive _woman with black hair and bulging muscles looking at their table. At about the same time, Veth made her way back to the table with beers in hand.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“ROUNDS FOR THE TABLE!” She screeched, causing both Bren to wince and Beau to snap out of her trance with the woman. Beau’s attention was soon captivated by the large woman a few tables away again, and the two women continued their staring contest._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________After maybe 10 seconds of Veth switching her gaze between Bren and Beau, confused by what was happening, Beau stood up, grabbed her ale and then as she walked past Bren, “I need this thank you”, she said, grabbing his tankard that he was currently reaching for and continued walking towards the woman._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Wait, that's my- there it goes.” Bren says as Beau nabs his tankard and walks away. As much as he was expecting to get drunk tonight, he can’t stop thinking about the war. What was he going to do? Return home? He couldn't do that, he needed to finish his education. He politely declined any offer Veth had on buying him a drink, electing to sit sober and listen to the music that was being mostly drowned out by chatter from the many patrons in the bar. “Veth? I think I'm going to retire back to our dorm, alright?” She nodded, mouth still on her tankard. “Don’t stay too late, I'd like to see you in the morning, ja?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Veth finally takes her mouth away from the cup and looks at Bren, not really being able to focus on him. “I’ll be fine, Bren,” _burp _, “I’ll be back in the morning, I promise.” Bren takes her word for it, and stands up, seeking the exit. As he passes by one of the tables to the door, he hears the murmuring of conversation.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________“Can you believe it? Why the fuck would Austria-Hungary think it’s a good idea to start a war with Serbia?” One man says_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________“I don’t know, but what I do know is they’re gonna lose, quick, especially if the Allies join Serbia.” Another comments._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________“Shame, I think Germany’s full of a bunch of pricks, but a lot of innocent people are gonna die, and I’ll bet money on that”. A third man says._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________Bren shivers at their comments and hastens his way to the door, swing it open and stepping into the street to walk back to his college._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________The air feels cold that night._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that the whole social system during the 1910's is being completely thrown under the bus but it's an au so shhhhhhh
> 
> (If there are tags that you think I'm missing please let me know! (Also comments and kudos are appreciated))


	3. Chapter 3

_1915_

The war in Europe has been pushing on a couple of years now, and although he hasn’t experienced direct attacks on him, Bren can’t help but fear for himself in case some people decide that the world would be better with one less Nazi.

_Nazi_ , he heard the word for the first time not too long ago, supposedly it was what the Germans called their soldiers. He’s been hearing it thrown around here in the U.S. also, just another slang term for the German people. Bren hated the term, it was incredibly generalizing, and from what he’s heard he doesn’t want anything to do with Germany’s military and their war. The only thing he finds himself caring about in Germany are his parents, who he hasn’t gotten word from in a few months. Realistically, he considers the fact that the odds of messages from Germany making it all the way to America is incredibly slim in these times, but that doesn’t stop him from worrying about something happening to his parents.

As for his “friend group”, it has somehow grown despite recent events and the mass prejudice against Germans in the states. Of course, it was only Veth for a considerable amount of time, and Bren was content with only her. Thanks to Veth, however, Bren found himself meeting many new faces that soon became friends. There was Beauregard; she and him had a considerably rocky start to their relationship, but as months passed a sibling-like relationship sprouted between the two of them. Not long after Beauregard had gone out to a bar with he and Veth, Bren met an impressively large, muscular, pale skinned woman who Beauregard came to his and Veth’s apartment, that was introduced as Yasha. He recognizes her as the large woman that had captivated Beau’s attention at the bar. It was through Yasha that he met a very colorful man by the name of Mollymauk Tealeaf. Apparently he did many circus-like acts at inns and taverns as a side-gig, and Bren could definitely see him doing such things with a personality that could be the exact opposite of Brens. 

The second time Bren went out to a bar with friends, including the two new members, Beau was a ways into her first drink when Bren saw something catch her eye behind him. She stood up from her chair and cupped her hands around her mouth, making a makeshift microphone, before yelling across the bar to what looked like an average looking guy and a man that looked like he’d challenge Yasha in terms of height. “YO, FJORD!” Bren heard from where he turned away from to look at the two men. The more average looking man, Fjord, he presumed, turned to look for the source of his name before his eyes caught on Beau and the rest of the table. Fjord turned to the man sitting next to him before the two of them stood up and started making their way towards their table. As the 2 men got closer, Bren saw that the man, Fjord, was the same Fjord that he had “befriended” from the ship he came on, and Bren quickly turned away from him before Fjord recognized him as well. 

Fjord and his friend grabbed seats near to Beau, and Beau immediately gave Fjord a what was supposed to be a playful punch on the shoulder, but resulted in an _ow_ from Fjord. While Fjord was massaging the spot on his shoulder that was just hit, Beau turned more towards him, “Hey man, it’s been a while. Have you been hitting the gym without me? Your arms look way less stringy than they used to. Also, who’s your friend?” She asks, gesturing towards the tall man who gives her a lazy smile.

“Clay, Caduceus Clay”, the man says.

Beau holds out a fist to Caduceus, “My name’s Beau”. When Caduceus doesn’t immediately return her fist bump she shakes her hand a little bit. Confused, Caduceus reaches out and shakes Beau’s clenched hand. “Ok, whatever”, she says before turning back to Fjord who looks like he’s trying to hide his slightly flushed face behind his drink, “So what’s up man? Long time no see, it’s been like what, 3 weeks?”

Fjord finishes his drink, and takes a quick look around the table, eyes lingering on Bren for a moment before tearing his eyes back to Beau. “Yeah, well”, Bren notices the southern drawl in his voice and chooses not to say anything about it, “first of all, 3 weeks really isn’t that long, Beau.”

“Well it is when you don’t have a gym buddy”

“And yeah,” Fjord continues, “I’ve been hitting the gym a lot more recently. Haven’t had too much to do with the war and shit going on.” His eyes dart back to Brens, who was pointedly looking away from him.

“Right, right”, Beau says absentmindedly, before turning to the 3 confused faces of her friends. “Oh, yeah. This is my friend you guys, um, his name’s Fjord. Fjord, this is Yasha, Molly, Veth, and Bren.” Bren internally cringed when Beau said his name, and wearily looked up and gave a little wave.

Something looked like it clicked for Fjord in that moment, a sudden realization, before he exclaimed with a grin, “Bren! So it was you that was on the boat! I thought it was you when I first saw you but I wasn’t sure!” Fjord turns to Beau briefly, “see, Beau, this is not seeing somebody for a while, it’s been three or so years since i’ve seen Bren!”

“Four”, Bren said quietly into his drink.

“Four years? That’s quite some time.” Caduceus said, and Bren paused for a second, wondering how he heard him before deciding he must’ve said it louder than he thought he did.

“Four years!” Fjord said, hearing Caduceus. “So, how have you been holding up? It must be pretty tough with the war going on and such”, Bren outwardly cringed at the mention of the war, but Fjord didn’t seem to notice.

“Um- ja, ja. Everything’s fine.” Bren says quickly, desperate to not talk about himself which he came to the bar to not think about. “How about you, Fjord? It has been quite some time.”

Thankfully, his deflection was successful and Fjord got into some stories about how he went on some merchant ship a few years ago delivering supplies and whatnot. Beau cut in at some point, asking about pirates, to which Fjord responded, “No, no pirates”. 

“Aw, bullshit”, Beau said before taking a long swig from her drink, clearly a bit tipsy and being held upright by Yasha.

“Yeah, yeah”, Fjord mumbled before continuing his story. Bren couldn’t help but wonder what was up with Fjord’s accent for most of the night. _Not like you’re ever going to confront him about it,_ he thinks.

\------------------------------

The German, “book club” Beau had called it, had grown into a considerably larger group than it had been when Bren first joined. He still didn’t see any need to talk with the others about books, so he enjoyed rather reading further in the back by himself and listening to the ambient voices of people discussing books in German. It was the closest thing Bren could find to home, especially now that he hadn’t gotten word from his parents in over a year. One late evening, as he was nearly finished with his book about the 21st president of the United States when the door flew open far more aggressively than people usually enter, and the sound of many heavy footfalls enter the front room. Bren considers getting up and checking out the commotion in the next room before he hears a loud commotion of curses and the sound of many chairs being knocked over. He opts to inch towards the back door as quietly as he can.

Bren hears the voice of a man, very clearly not speaking German, and he assumes it belongs to one of the men who just recently walked in. “You fucking Nazis have no place here”, he growls, before the sounds of rushing, heavy footfalls are heard in the room followed by gory sounds of knives, hammers, and clubs cutting and bashing into people. He hears the familiar screams of some of the Germans and at that moment is certain as to what is happening in the next room over. Bren stops caring about being quiet and rushes to the back door as quickly as he can. He steps out into the alley and starts running as fast as he can to where his dorm is. It takes a moment for him to orient himself, since he’s never exited the shop from the back before, but eventually when he’s sure of where he’s running and a substantial distance between the small library he runs out of the alley into the main street. As soon as he runs out, he crashes into a person walking by and they both crash to the ground. He tries to get up, but after his sprinting and unexpected crash, he is absolutely winded and can't find it in himself to get up. He hears the sound of someone getting up a few feet away from him and light footsteps making their way over to him.

“I’m so sorry!” A voice calls from above him, and when he opens his eyes he sees a girl with shoulder length black hair leaning over him with eyebrows furrowed with worry. “I wasn’t looking where I was going, are you alright?”

Bren, feeling as if a couple screws have been knocked loose in his head, finds himself struggling to form words, and gets out a little “yeah” in the least German accent he can muster. He hears the girl let out a suppressed giggle before moving to be more in front of him.

“Well then get up, silly, you’ll get your jacket all dirty by lying there”, she says with a smile before leaning down and holding a hand out to him. “I’m Jester, by the way!” 

Bren can feel his brain faltering a bit because _oh God, she’s cute isn’t she,_ “I’m uh, I’m B-” He pauses briefly, deciding that “Bren” is a little too German, “I’m C-Caleb”, he says as he grabs her hand in his and she hauls him up to his feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok it's been a really long time since I've updated this. I don't know, maybe with all of the free time stuck in my house I'll be able to find motivation to write this more often :/, but here's chapter three y'all

**Author's Note:**

> The poem is "The New Colossus" by Emma Lazarus. 
> 
> I don't really write that much so constructive criticism is appreciated. Thanks for reading!
> 
> (I know it says 1/1 chapters but there's going to be more chapters in case you were worrying)


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